I've always liked the dark. Well, I take it back...I currently love the dark. I used to loathe it, I mean- I couldn't see through it...I didn't know what was in it...so it just seems logical to be afriad of it. To hate it. Right?

Lets think of this literally: darkness. When I was a little buritto I was terrified of the dark. I couldn't be alone in the dark ever...I used to have to make Nikki, who's three years younger than me, go with me to the bathroom because I was so afraid of being alone in the late hours. But, when I had someone it wasn't so bad. I felt safe. Nikki was like a flashlight for me. She helped me through this darkness.

The present is not really important...seeing as if you think about it literally we're living in the future right now. Every second that goes by was last seconds future. So, fuck the present- lets focus on the future.

Most of us may have an idea of what our future will be like...I know I do...but, for the most part our future is dark. And for most of us it is a scary thing. I would say that at this very moment, tomorrow is dark for me. I don't know what I'll be doing- but I can probably be sure I'll sleep till at least noon thirty.

However, I do know a few things- and these few things are like a flashlight that helps lead me through the darkness. I know I'll still have a great boyfriend, one who really cares and is always there for me. I know I'll still have my family- and a roof over my head. I know that I'll still have a freakin' kick ass job. I know that I'll still have a few good friends left. Some that actually mean a whole damn lot to me. I know that I'll still have the opportunity for change. We take this for granted. I know my hopes and plans for my future; I know I'll be attending WSU this fall. And lastly, I know I'll still be me: Holly Tamale.

With all this, why should I be afraid of the future? The "darkness" if you will.

And that's where people go wrong...people in diaryland starting out their intros using mysterious analogies of this "darkness" that is supposivly so scary. Find your flashlight...sure, it doesn't reveal all the secrets this darkness holds...but, at least it'll show you where you're stepping.

<-gordon & maroon->